I woke up this past Sunday morning feeling...FLESHY. You know, that moment when you want to say everything on your mind with no repercussions. I knew exactly what I WAS NOT to do and exactly what I WAS, but I DIDN'T want to do it. God was telling me to sit tight. Be silent. NOT do a thing. But in my flesh, I wanted to act. I wanted to step in and speak my mind. The last think I wanted to do was wait. I'd pray about it and then talk out loud to myself. Truth is, I wrestled. WWF Flesh vs Spirit kind of wrestled. The more I wrestled, the more FLESH led I became and the more flesh that appeared, the further I drifted from Truth. The further I drifted from Christ.
"I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate...sin dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out."
Romans 7:15-18
I was standing in the bathroom when I felt the Spirit tell me to hit the floor. I don't mean pound the floor with my fist. I mean, nose to floor, laid out silence. Minutes ticked on the clock. Church was getting closer and my flesh was still winning. I had justified every one of my thoughts, forcing myself to believe my way was right. However, as much as I wanted to flesh step, I couldn't because I knew it was wrong. The guilt over my flesh felt worse than the flesh itself. I was to wait. I was to watch. I was to see the power of God break and work in hearts. I was not to enter but to remain still. My stomach sickened at my desire for flesh just minutes before. Guilt formed until I felt I was wrong to even approach God. I went back to the days of feeling unworthy, not welcomed in His presence. I went back to LIES. Lies that formed themselves as truth. Wolves in sheepskin. I could hear the clock ticking away my flesh. Time in His presence. Ticking away the lies. Healing words spoken over my soul.
"Therefore, brothers [Makaela], since we have confidence to enter the holy places by the blood of Jesus, by the new and living way that he opened for us through the curtain, that is, through his flesh, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us [Makaela] draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us [Makaela] hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering,
for he who promised is faithful."
Hebrews 10:19-23
How quickly the flesh drowns truth. Pulls away from light. Light cannot mask itself. Light is True within. Light is Truth within. Christ is Light.
Identify the Lie: Too much evil. Too much flesh. Unworthy. Unwelcome. I cannot approach.
Claim the Truth: Draw near. I have been claimed, cleansed with Truth, and forgiven.
To believe the lie is to keep from His presence. To keep from Truth. Wolves devour. Defeat the deceived. The lie bears oppression, guilt, and shame. The lie is NOT Christ. Is not growth. Is not Truth. Identify the lie. Kill the lie.
Confidence is mine. As His children, confidence is ours. Confidently approach no matter the weight of guilt. Walk in TRUTH. Walk in Christ. For He who shed His blood, slew sins curse. Cleared your path. Cleansed your heart. Washed you pure. HOLD STEADY. HOLD TO HOPE. WAIVER NOT from Truth. He who promised is faithful.
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